Choosing Friends

 

One who is righteous is a guide to his neighbor, but the way of the wicked leads them astray. Proverbs 12:26

 

I was a new Christian when I heard a man teach that a best friend for a Christian can only be another Christian. I was a little irritated by the statement. As I have grown in my understanding of what God wants for His people, I now agree.

Our best friends are those people close enough to have a real influence on our lives. The Bible warns us to choose wisely, as the verse above warns, another person (even a friend) can lead us astray.

How do we avoid being “led astray?”

There is nothing God tells us to do that He does not give us the proper instruction to do right. These verses (and the one at the top of the page) speak to the process of  not being deceived into a relationship with someone who may “lead us astray.”

• Proverbs 17:9 Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends.
• Proverbs 16:28 A dishonest man spreads strife, and a whisperer separates close friends.
• Proverbs 20:19 Whoever goes about slandering reveals secrets; therefore do not associate with a simple babbler.
• Proverbs 22:24-25, Make no friendship with a man given to anger, nor go with a wrathful man, lest you learn his ways and entangle yourself in a snare.

These verses warn us that people who display these tendencies will not be good for us. In fact, given time, they will hurt us.

Jesus said, “No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you (John 15:15).”  Think about all the ways that Jesus either demonstrated friendship or taught about it.

He befriended people by loving them in teaching them what God the Father had made known to Him (John 15:15). He befriended them by loving them enough to lay down His life for them (John 15:13). He befriended them by speaking the truth about their behavior (John 15:2).  He befriended them by teaching about the expectations of God (John 15:3, 4, 8, 10).

In John 15:11 Jesus tells His disciples what would be in it for them when they show they are His friends by obeying His commands. “These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full (John 15:11).” Jesus set the example by obeying the commands of His Father.

If we were each to examine our own behaviors and attitudes, as well as our beliefs, would another Christian think we make good friends?  If we look closely at our best friends, have we made wise choices?

Do not be deceived: Bad company ruins good morals. 1 Corinthians 15:33