Family Government
Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Ephesians 6:4
Family is one of the forms of government God has established. It is the structure that God set up for us to be born into to teach and train His children to live for Him.
After Solomon had been crowned as King over Israel (civil government) he prayed to God about his role over the people of God. As parents, we hold the same responsibility to God in governing our families as he did over Israel, keeping in mind that government includes peace-keeping, protection, and (in the case of families) provision. Here is his prayer. As you read it try to relate it to our role as parents.
“Give your servant therefore an understanding mind to govern your people, that I may discern between good and evil, for who is able to govern this your great people?” 1 Kings 3:9
I have been listening to story after story lately of adults who have been raised by “Christian” parents who seem to have no understanding of this responsibility to govern their children. The faith of their parents came out on Sunday mornings but most of the week there was conflict, fear, even abuse in the home. At the very least, there was a lack of protection of the children from worldly influences and ungodly leaders in other settings.
Things have become accepted in our culture that we, as Christians, need to question. Even unbelievers who want to protect their children need to think about these things.
It might seem very “progressive” and “liberating” to think that a daughter is making great progress as an athlete on the football or wrestling team. Maybe she holds her own very well out on the field or on the mat. How many of those girl’s parents have considered the fact that those young, innocent girls are going to have to ride to and from those games or matches in a dark bus loaded with young men feeling very virile after an athletic success?
A young woman recently told me the coaches at the front of the bus are oblivious to what’s happening in the back. Do we really want our young women in that situation? One young girl, on a bus, in the dark, with many testosterone-laden boys?
Another conversation covered what happens in a dark gymnasium, with lighting set for ambiance, while junior and senior high kids have a dance. There are chaperones. There are even some well-lit places. I was told that things haven’t changed for the better in the many years since I’ve attended a school dance. These are not safe places for our young women or our young men. The dancing is sexual and suggestive in a generation of boys who have been exposed to pornography. The conversations can be as dirty as the dancing.
I fear for the futures of our children being raised in homes, “Christian” or otherwise, whose parents are not discerning about the situations they send their children into. It is a father’s responsibility to protect his children. We are quick to run out and buy guns so we can be prepared if someone attacks one of our family members but we are slow to say “no” to a bad situation that other kids are being permitted to be a part of. Sometimes protection comes in the form of one word, “no”. We seem to be more willing to pull out our weapons than we are to speak the truth to our children, especially our teens, even when we know we are sending them, literally, to the wolves.
Life must be confusing for teens whose parents take them to church, pray the sinner’s prayer with them, and take part in ministry. How do teens reconcile the teaching of being set apart for God, the command to “be holy as I am holy” with the willingness of otherwise godly parents to send them into a pack of wolves where they witness and/or experience unholy behaviors?
Is this part of what God was talking about when he said, “Father’s do not provoke your children to anger”?
How are we to discern what is good, what is right, and what is most effective in raising our children to love and serve the Lord? Solomon started with prayer about how to govern the people of God. Are you and I willing to pray about how to govern our families for God?
Are you willing to call on God’s grace to prevent the shutting down of family government?