Focus on the Example

  For I have given you an example, that you also should do just as I have done to you.

John_13:15 

 

I was just reading about a man who said, “A while back I found myself talking on the phone, emailing on my laptop, and playing Wii with my daughter all at once.” It reminded me of how often I have watched parents walking with a toddler while talking on their cell phones, ignoring the world around them and the child. It is just as prevalent in the adult world. How many men are sitting in a restaurant with friends keeping one eye on the TV or their phones to know the score of a baseball game?  

It seems we have lost the ability to focus on one event or person. When my children were growing up I realized that I learned the most about their lives when it was just me and one of them in the car. I would turn off the radio and they would talk, telling me the things I wanted to ask about but often they were too distracted by other things to tell me about them. 

Technology is good and I would not want to give it up. The burden it lifts is incredible and should be the thing that allows us some extra time with God, being still before Him, or with family and friends.  Sadly, it seems to have become the very thing that keeps us from focusing on what is more important. I have to turn off my phone if I am not to be tempted to answer it when I doing my devotions or am out with friends.  

The scriptures remind us again and again that we are to set an example for others. Jesus said in John 13:15, “For I have given you an example, that you also should do just as I have done to you.” If we think about what Jesus did and how He responded to the needs of others it is very convicting for those who like to keep one eye on their phones or computers.  

When Jesus was overwhelmed by crowds, when he had been performing miracles and talking to people for days, He still had compassion on the people. Even right after Jesus heard about the death of John the Baptist He left to get away but people saw where He went with the disciples and followed Him. Mark 6:34 tells us, “When he went ashore he saw a great crowd, and he had compassion on them, because they were like sheep without a shepherd. And he began to teach them many things.” He put the needs of the crowds over His own needs.  

Even today, when His people call on His Name, Jesus listens. He is the One who always has time for those He loves. We can be assured that he is paying attention, interceding on our behalf, and hearing our prayers. Jesus said, “For I have given you an example, that you also should do just as I have done to you.” John 13:15   

Many people, especially parents, seem to think that time in the same room or doing the same activity is “quality time” with their kids. The fact is that our kids need to know that when they approach us we will listen. They need the understanding that their needs are a high priority to us. If our attention is focused on the phone, the game, the computer screen, or the video game – the child is not the focus.  

I am not saying that a Dad and his teenage son shouldn’t play video games – please do. The game, however, should be the secondary focus and the son, primary focus. If computer games are something we use as a distraction from the world, a little hiatus from work, fine. But, if a child enters the room with a desire to talk or a need for direction, turn it off and offer full attention to the child.  The fact is it may take some time to determine if that is what the child needs.  

As I read what the man said about being on the phone, the laptop, and playing Wii with his daughter I could not help but wonder what the daughter was thinking. She had time with her Dad who was sharing it with two other people. Maybe he’s a Dad who gives his daughter plenty of undivided attention – I don’t know.  

Christ showed compassion, He gave up His own time and desires to minister to others who came to Him. He is the Example we are to follow. When the phone is ringing, the email is on screen, and the Wii is running – Who – or what example will we focus on?

1 Comment

  1. Suzi Ciliberti on June 23, 2012 at 9:13 am

    A word fitly spoken …
    I couldn’t help but think that this is good advice for husbands and wives as well. All that great focus and attention before marriage is easily lost in the needs and activities of the day. But what if for just one hour everyday that gal or guy you were so attracted to and focused on before you said, “I do,” became the absolute devotion of your day once again? I think we model for out children how to love others not only by the way we love them but also by the way we love our spouses. I have to say my friend that loving family, children and spouses well, is something you have modeled well for me. I thank you!

    Doing what Jesus did in this broken, selfish, sinful condition is pretty much impossible . . . except for the incredible gift of the Spirit. Indwelled by and equipped by the Spirit who illuminates for us the truth of God’s Word is all that we need to do this. That is so amazing it boggles the mind. Jesus says that we should do just as He has done for us… and then He moves into our hearts to do it with us . . . for us . . . through us. Dancing in the minefields is so much easier with Jesus as your dance teacher, your sense of rhythm and the melody playing in your heart.