Friendly Words

Oil and perfume make the heart glad, and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel. Proverbs 27:9

“A friend corrected my thinking and I’ve been much better about that. I still ask for prayer every time because I want to be covered but I’m not nearly as afraid.”  This is basically what a friend told me when I asked her how her flights from her last trip had gone. She has asked me to pray every time she travels because she fears being in the air.

What she went on to explain was that a Christian friend had reminded her a few years ago about the worst thing that could happen to her if a plane went down, death. The friend pointed out that, for her, a believer in the Lord Jesus Christ, this is good, she would be with Him. Though she still doesn’t like to fly, she is at peace about what could happen.

Another friend told me about a diagnosis that includes a rather gloomy prognosis from a human view. Her friend reminded her that, for her, the prognosis is not a thing to fear, but a paradise to look forward to. She knows Jesus, too, and can look forward to a place and time when she will regain her strength and health and will be able to enjoy her eternal life, including a new body.

Though it may sound foolish to the world to “encourage” our friends with the truth of what death from here will bring according to the scriptures, these are the only words that can encourage anyone. Not all truth is easy to face but one of our commands is to “encourage one another.” God’s word is what will balance a heavy weight to bear.

Is there anything encouraging in pointing out to someone who is very ill that they may be sick for a very long time, fight hard to win the war with a disease, and die anyway? Would it have been encouraging for my friend who is afraid to fly to hear how much training pilots get or how few Airplanes actually crash when what she knows is that some planes do crash? (Okay, that might be good for her to know, too). We can’t promise healing, though God can and does heal some. We cannot promise that a plane will not crash. We cannot promise that a marriage will last until old age. We cannot promise that a baby will be born with no problems to face.

What we can promise and encourage another believer with is the Truth of the scriptures. Here are some very encouraging verses to know and use when you want to encourage a friend in what God can do for them when we can’t do much:

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16

“For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.” Philippians 1:21

“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.” Psalm 46:1

“The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth.” Psalm 145:18

“And he called to him his twelve disciples and gave them authority over unclean spirits, to cast them out, and to heal every disease and every affliction. “ Matthew 10:1

“He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.” (About heaven) Revelation 21:4

When David was running and hiding in the wilderness because King Saul was seeking to find him to kill him, his friend, Jonathan, went to him and “strengthened his hand in God.” (1 Samuel 23:16) He reminded David of the promises of God.

As we find our Christian friends in circumstances that may require some building up, if they need to be strengthened in the Lord, to help them face whatever causes them to fear, do we have the courage (and the knowledge) to point out the truths of the scripture for them? We need to be gentle, not dismissive of their fears, but we need to be clear that God will calm them and bring peace. He will be their refuge and strength.

Fear of flying , fear of death, fear of commitments, fear of change, fear of judgment, fear of what people think… there is no fear for which God’s Word does not have the remedy.  Ephesians 5 tells us that the Word of God is the sword of the Spirit. It is a weapon that will make us fearless!