Hearing a Child’s Heart

 

… let him know that whoever brings back a sinner from his wandering will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins. James 5:20

The Conversation

I was within earshot of a conversation between a father and his ten-ish year old daughter. We were in a large pottery store. I overheard the father reminding the daughter that she had spelling words to memorize when they got home. Then, I was out of earshot for a few minutes.

When I walked into the next room the daughter was telling her father that he was going to buy her something. He said, “Not today, at least not here.” She responded in a very harsh tone that she was going to get something before she left that store.

Her father responded back, calmly and without acknowledging her tone, “I’ll tell you what, I’ll make you a deal..” I was sure he was going to say, “when you can address me with a respectable tone of voice” or “When you learn that you are not to tell me what to do…”

I was disappointed when he said something like, “When you get the spelling words all memorized, I’ll buy you something.”

I was so disappointed. It’s not that I like hearing a child being reprimanded by a parent. What I like is a parent who is more concerned about the character of his daughter than he is about her spelling words. This little girl has a bigger problem than her homework. It is in her heart.

The Heart of the Problem

Jesus addressed this “heart” problem several times. In Matthew 15:18 He said, “But what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a person. “

As parents we have a responsibility to teach children what they need to know to lead godly and productive lives that benefit them, as well as those she will interact with as an adult. A young girl who shows no respect for the authorities God has placed over her (whether the family is Christian or not) will face difficult times.

When we hear this tone of voice come out of the mouths of our own children, are we more concerned about who might be listening, or that there is a soul at stake? Proverbs 23:14 tells us that disciplining a child, even with a rod, is good for her/him. It “will save his soul from Sheol.” This is not talking about a beating so bad the child is permanently damaged. It is talking about a form of discipline that will make them think about the consequences of that behavior.

Often, we want to hear the heart of a child who has been hurt or emotionally upset. It is just as important to listen to the words that come out of the heart of a child when they are the ones doing the hurting. Building character in a child is hard work. The Bible gives clear instructions.

Will you discipline your child entrusting her/his heart to the Saver of souls, or will you choose to walk away more concerned for the worldly matters, risking that the heart of that child will wind up in Sheol?