Humbling Day
Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Philippians 2:3
I sometimes marvel at how blind I was to my own sin. As God began working in my heart the first thing He clearly showed me was the depth of my own sin. I was horrified. How could that be? I’m such a good person.
Today I was to meet some people and go to a popular breakfast spot to mark the end of our karate class. I have been picking up a couple of teenage boys every week for a few months. Every week they’re late and every week I remind them that the class is waiting for us (okay, there are only three others in the class but it’s the principle of the thing).
Today, we were to take a 45 minute drive after we met and so I reminded them at least three times about the time we were to meet. They were late and I was unhappy about it. I started to give the first one there a hard time. He said, “Hey, I’m here, don’t judge me!” Both of us were using our “kinda-sorta” kidding voices.
When we picked up the second one (because I got tired of waiting at the appointed spot) I told him about it, too. He was completely unconcerned.
I was taught that to be late is to be selfish. The message we send is, “My time is more important than yours or what I have to do is more important than your time.” I don’t like to send that message though I sometimes do. I thought I should teach them the lesson, too.
The second part of my day was spent with my 2 ½ year old granddaughter, Stella. At least ten times this afternoon I heard her say, “Yook at me, yook at me!” I have heard this considerably more frequently than I did before her new brother was born a month ago. Before him we were all looking at her!
In another event today I caught myself wondering why, when I had been so kind to someone, they had failed to even thank me. I even mentioned it out loud to my daughter. As I began to think about these things and put them all together I thought about how God had to show me my sin for me to believe that I had any a few years ago. Today it was screaming at me!
How am I unlike those teenage boys who are not considering others? How am I unlike my 2 ½ year old granddaughter saying “Yook at me”? I was looking for a little recognition for a kind act. When I didn’t get it I told someone about it. For the record she handled me well, not giving me the glory I was looking for! Matthew 6:2 gives us a warning about looking for praise from people. “Thus, when you give to the needy, sound no trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may be praised by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward.”
Surely, just as God’s word says, “All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.” I’m still included in the “all”.
Even now I marvel at how blind I can be to my own sin. More worrisome is that the blinders come off when it comes to the sins of others. I have a friend who tells me that when we point a finger at someone else there are three pointing back at us.
The good news in all of this is that Christ died for my sin. Because I have believed that truth and received the gift of salvation from God, when He sees me He sees the righteousness of Christ. My sins are forgiven. My own good works are still filthy rags to God when I want to be recognized for them but Jesus is interceding for me. This is the mercy and grace He shows to those who believe in Him.
So, I’m not the good person that I always thought I was and now I see clearly that I’m not alone, all have sinned. I can also see that I need to show some of the mercy and grace to others that God has shown to me.