Never Too Old to Envy

 

As one of six children and one of those being a really smart and gifted twin, it was easy to be envious or to covet what one of them had. It appeared that their God-given skills came easily to them while I struggled to keep my grades up and participate in things where I had the same level of gift. (The family joke is that my twin graduated from college Magna Cum Laude and I graduated “thank the Laude.”)

By God’s grace, our mother was quick to see envy or covetousness and nip it in the bud. She would remind us that we all have gifts and each one’s would be different. She taught us that no matter what we did there would always be someone better than us at it and someone who we were better than. We should be no more proud of being “better than” than we should be distraught that we were not as good as someone else.

It may be that one advantage of a large family is that envy and covetousness are more likely to arise. We were taught early that life is not a competition but an opportunity to serve others.

Envy and covetousness are easy sins to identify in others but take a little longer to admit when they’re ours. Yet, there seems to be no stage of life, from small child to retired person in their eighties, when we are not confronted with someone who does something better than we do or has more of something that we want (money, education, house, garden, health grandkids, status, etc.), so we are tempted to be envious.

The Bible clearly addresses envy and covetousness many times. Neither is presented in a positive way but always as sinful and often divisive. Look at James 3:13-16:

Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show by good conduct that his works are done in the meekness of wisdom.  But if you have bitter envy and self-seeking in your hearts, do not boast and lie against the truth. This wisdom does not descend from above, but is earthly, sensual, demonic. For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there.

Envy happens when a person’s thoughts are only on themselves and how they look and how they are being affected by someone else’s gifts, talents, or possessions.

The verses that follow describe a better path; James 3:17-18:

But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy.  Now the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.

We should pray for this kind of wisdom.

Ephesians 4 addresses the thief and says that “he who stole should steal no longer.” This would be a good policy for the one who envies or covets what others have. He who envies should envy no longer. However, first there is some understanding of humility, repentance, and even loving our neighbor that needs to increase in us so we can apply the truth of God’s Word to our enviousness. Then we can obey God in Romans 12:15:

Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep.