Peace Producing Truth
Some people are offended and can’t hold back the anger from the smallest slight. Many others have much thicker skin and have to be truly sinned against before they get angry or downright mad. In either case, forgiveness is necessary to move on in a relationship.
Sometimes, the slight or sin is not acknowledged. There is no apology or, even worse, the other person doesn’t think they’ve done anything wrong – even when we think it was pure evil (maybe even requiring a police report).
In His grace, the Lord has left us His Word to know how to approach these circumstances when we are sinned against. I would refer you to Matthew 18:15 – 18. There we are instructed to go to the one who (we believe) has sinned against us and tell him how we see the situation. The Bible says “tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother.”
Problem solved in this case. This could also mean that, in the discussion, we see how we wrongly understood things. Again, problem solved.
However, the scripture then deals with what often happens when the two do not agree on what happened or who is at fault. The next verse says, (16) But if he will not hear, take with you one or two more, that ‘by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.
Sadly, some disagreements end here with no real resolution, at least not to our satisfaction. We can take the next step and take it to the church but that often leads to the offender’s leaving the church rather than dealing with the need for repentance.
There is a separation. There is no agreement on who is at fault. Perhaps something really wicked has happened and, though the person has been cut off from fellowship (hoping that the pain of the separation will draw them to repentance), there has been no resolution of the original actions from the victim’s point of view.
What is the good Christian woman to do? Trust God. Forgive. Keep living.
These verses in Matthew are not the end all of a grievance between two people. Our God loves justice and what man cannot do, God will. Romans 12:19 says, “Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay,” says the Lord.”
This is so difficult to truly understand and to believe that we do not have to prove anything beyond being willing to tell what we have witnessed and forgive a repentant one who has sinned against us. Difficult or not, we must believe that if it is left “undone” to our satisfaction, God will provide vengeance where vengeance is due.
Another great “peace” that can come from this is that, if, in our human frailty, we are wrong about the circumstances, vengeance from God will be perfectly decided and executed – or not! He makes no mistakes.
When we are slighted, i.e., passed over for a position we wanted, interrupted in conversation, or left off the invitation list to a dinner, we need to “get over it.” (Mark 11:25, Proverbs 12:16).
But, if we are truly sinned against, we need to deal with it quickly in order to bring back peace and move on with the work of the Lord. If that is not done to our satisfaction in spite of using the biblical model, we need to still forgive and give God the room to exact justice as He will. Maybe we’ll see it and maybe we won’t but we can know that God keeps His promises.
Trusting God to take vengeance is a most difficult test of our faith but a peace producing truth for our own hearts and minds.