Shhhh

“ If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” Libby Faulkner (my Mom).

 

I like to try new recipes. My 8 year old granddaughter and 5 year old grandson are not fond of this hobby. Chicken nuggets every night would be fine with them.

Tonight, as they were introduced to yet another new dish our granddaughter said, “I’d rather be eating chicken nuggets or the chicken we used to get from Publix when we lived in Georgia.”

I quoted my Mom to her (above), which started a little discussion about being satisfied with what we have and not complaining about what we do not have.

What I thought about later is how like my little granddaughter many adults are. Why do we feel compelled to tell people when we don’t like something? Can’t we just think about it and remain silent? How often are feelings hurt or misunderstandings started because we verbalize something when we should have said nothing at all?

Proverbs 11:12 says, “Whoever belittles his neighbor lacks sense, but a man of understanding remains silent.”

I don’t think my granddaughter was trying to belittle me. From her perspective, she was just stating a fact. At the same time, it felt like a criticism in my choice of what to feed her.

In my mother’s teaching about not saying anything unless we have something nice to say, I think she was talking about just such occasions as this dinner with my grandchildren. Her lesson was more about self-control than it was complaints.

We do not have to enjoy everything that happens to us or everything we are served. We may need to acknowledge that not everything must be to our liking or personal preferences. If our opinion or complaint is not going to change the circumstances – then maybe we should just be quiet.

I can remember my own mother with her finger horizontally placed over her lips and a quiet little “shhhh” to remind me that what I was saying wasn’t all that nice.

Sometimes we have to say the hard stuff to people when they make choices that will hurt us or them. But, sometimes we just need to “shhh”.

Whether it is a new recipe or a new set of circumstances, I pray we will have the discernment to know when to do speak and when to be quiet.