• Being the Big Girl

    humility

    Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity.  1 Timothy 4:12

     

    My granddaughter, Stella, was visiting with two of my great-nieces. She is five and a half and they are three. While out of the hearing range of their mothers the two little girls got into an argument over a cup.  Stella, wanting to resolve the problem, stepped up to the plate and said, “Well, it looks like I’m the big girl here.” She explained to me that after this statement the little girls started to share and all went well the rest of the afternoon.

    The words sounded so prideful coming from my granddaughter but I could see she was right. At three they do not have the reasoning skills to settle the argument without a full-blown fight of the three year old, “who can cry and scream the loudest” variety.  Her “intervention” was enough to stop the escalation.

    I thought to myself, “Wow, how many times have I wanted to intervene in some petty discussion or argument thinking something along the lines of, “It looks like I’m the big girl here.” Of course, as an adult, we would not make that announcement but hopefully could step in with some words of wisdom and discernment.

    It is, in fact, a biblical idea. Galatians 6:1 says, “Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted.” According to “The Complete Word Study Dictionary” this  “spiritual” one is one who has had the breath of God blown into them. I read that to say that they have the power of the Holy Spirit directing them. The real hard part and the key to doing this kind of corrective intervention well is to do it “in a spirit of gentleness” which, at least for me, is what I will rely on the Holy Spirit to help with. I am not always gentle with my words.

    The verse warns us to keep a watch on ourselves so we aren’t tempted. We can fall into sin, in this case childish actions and words, if we aren’t careful. We give up the “big girl” status when we become a part of the problem.

    Self-righteous people – at five or fifty five – can be pretty hard to take. The “I’m the big girl here” attitude may come off just as prideful as it sounded from my granddaughter. In order to be gentle we will have to muster up some humility. We might be the big girl this time but there will probably come a time when we’ll take a turn at needing big girl correction.

    The more gently we approach others, the more gently we are likely to be approached when it is coming back at us.